New Year = New Me = No Excuses

Ephesians 4:22: You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; ²³ to be made new in the attitude of your minds; ²⁴ and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

New Year = New Me = No Excuses.  A couple months back I took a leap of faith & went to a free session of bootcamp instructed by a friend of a friend.  I got hooked right away and started with one day a week, creeped up to two days a week and will be committing to three days a week starting Monday.  And so will my husband :)  Oh, and another friend has joined me...I'm adding more and more accountability partners - one of my BFF's goes with me (my other two BFF's want to come but live too far away) and I have another friend who attends and we carpool...that's major accountability! 

So, why am I getting myself up at the buttcrack of dawn (haha, had to throw that in there)?!  Well, I had three babies in four years.  That is far from kind to a woman's body.  I was in the fittest shape of my life before I got pregnant the first time.  And then I got pregnant again.  And then again.  I had little time to get back in shape in between pregnancies.  So, now that we are Officially done, I feel like I can focus on getting my body to a place where I feel comfortable in my skin again.  Plus, I want to teach my children healthy habits and one of those is through regular exercise.  In fact, my boys ask about us exercising and I love it!  It's so cute too when they try to pick up a weight or do my Jillian Michaels DVD with me. 

Onto my main point here.  This is about more than just getting into physical shape.  This journey is about getting into mental and spiritual shape.  What do you mean, you ask?  Well, this is practicing my self-discipline.  I've been doing some soul-searching lately and have discovered that self-discipline is more than simply mental strength.  It's spiritual strength as well.  Since I was a kid, I have struggled with a mammoth-sized sweet tooth.  I mean finish off a 13x9" pan of rice crispy treats. by. myself.  I could take down a bag of candy or box of cookies in record time.  No kidding.  I would just eat a salad or something light for the meal closest to my sweet tooth attack.  That balanced things out, right?!  Not so much.  I saw that my kids were watching.  I was caught.  Sneaking a handful of M&M's when I had just told my kids "no" to having them.  It's bigger than simply wanting to be healthy, to keep the extra pudge off, to keep my arteries clear.  I was/am dealing with an addiction.  I have used sweets as my escape for years.  Whenever I am tired, having a long day, the kids acting up, fillintheblank I would grab a sweet treat.  I would tell myself I "needed" it to feel normal again, to justify the indulgence.  Whoah.  This wasn't working.

So, for the month of December, our bootcamp group chose to give up something beloved.  Mine was sweet tea.  Eeekkk!!!  I'd already dumped the Coca-Cola (and replaced it with sweet tea...not much better).  The first three days were hard.  Very hard.  Then it got easier (but not easy), until the end of the month.  For awhile, I was dreaming about the day I could get a sweet tea again.  And that day came and went.  And I didn't want one!  And I still don't want one.  I realize how much progress I've made and I don't want to regress.  However, I had to admit to myself that I had replaced sweet tea with sweet treats.  Uh oh.  So, around Christmastime, I decided to give up chocolate.  Baby steps here.  It's been over a week and I'm alive!!!  It hasn't been as difficult as I expected, maybe it's because I had sweet tea to warm me up to this challenge. 

But there's more here.  I've been praying, asking for more, asking for wisdom on how to get this under control, for revelation on why we, as humans, work on self-discipline.  I received a piece of it two weeks ago...I told my husband, I think we work on self-discipline because as God's people, we are in spiritual warfare.  Therefore we must be well-trained and always on-guard to defend what we know and believe.  But if we are not trained physically and mentally (what seems to be the "easier" parts), then how can we be trained spiritually?  It was a lightbulb going off in my head but I felt there was more.  And it hit me this morning as I was reading Matthew 4.  Jesus was tempted after being in the desert for forty days.  He was tired, hungry and alone.  All the same excuses I used to allow myself a sweet treat.  Yet He resisted Satan's temptations to alleviate each of those things.  Boom.  There it is.  If I cannot resist worldy temptations when I'm tired, hungry or alone, then how good of a  Christian can I truly be?  How can I resist any other temptation in this world?  So, this is why my goal for this year is to work on my self-discipline in the areas of exercise and eating healthy.  It is truly about making lifestyle changes, not just temporary changes so that I can go back to how I was before.  And I must "put off [my] old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires...put on [my] new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness" (Eph 4:22-24). 

As a Christian, I must "honor God with [my] body" for it is a "temple of the Holy Spirit" (1 Corinth 6:19-20).  Who's with me?!   

    

A True Confession

Want to hear a true confession of a FT SAHM? Lately I've been fighting burn-out. Yup, I said it. I write this after I spent the last 30 minutes cleaning up Coca-Cola all over my kitchen. It. Was. Everywhere. I mean everywhere. I had to get a chair to clean it off the wall, it was at least 6-feet up. It was on the kid's table, the big table, on the window, blinds, wall art, door...you get the point. Owen had gotten into the pantry (like he so often does), however we rarely have soda in the house (I bought it for his birthday party on Sunday). So, I didn't think anything of it and put the box on the floor. Big mistake. Owen found it, stacked the cans on his table & Cole accidentally knocked it over and one burst open. Who knew 12 ounces was so much. When I go to drink one of those, 12 ounces doesn't seem to go far and I'm looking at the bottom of the can wondering where the rest of it is?

But seriously, I wonder how other full-time stay-at-home-moms (FT SAHMs) fight burn out? Or am I the only one? I can't imagine I'm the only one. But I feel guilty admitting this. I don't want anyone to think I don't love my children because I do. I just get tired of always cleaning up messes (which more times than not could've been prevented like this morning's incident), constantly refereeing fights and arguments, changing diapers or taking someone to the potty or having someone stare at me or flush the toilet as I potty, the yelling, whining, demanding, and constant reminders to use manners and speak politely, and some days not having Any adult interaction until my hubby gets home. I know this is what I signed up for when I chose to stay home full-time, I get it. But doesn't most everyone get a little tired of their job at some point?

Sometimes I think how great it would be to work and come home to a clean house because no one has been here all day to make a mess, to be able to afford someone to clean my house or do my yard, to be able to afford to have my car detailed (or even pay to go through the car wash....yes, that sounds ridiculous that I don't have money for a car wash, I probably do if I emptied my change cup but I choose to spend our "blow" money on other things like a quick meal when I'm having a long day or for other odds and ends that come up throughout the week). How nice it would be to only referee the kids for a few hours each day instead of 24/7. How nice it would be to have a haircut more than twice a year. Or to have a pedicure more often than just on special occasions. I know that haircuts and pedicures might go a little ways in helping me to fight burn-out but you see, just because we can "afford" for me to stay at home does not mean that we are rolling in the dough as some may assume. Those who "afford" for a spouse to stay at home full-time make big sacrifices financially. I'm not saying that we scrape by because we don't. But we do live on a strict cash budget. And by "cash" I mean no "financing" options nor credit cards nor any type of payments (except mortgage) in this household. I'm just trying to get my mind straight here. If anyone wants to share their burn-out protection suggestions, I'm all ears! And before anyone goes getting all judgmental on me here and says I need to make some time for myself before the kids get up in the morning (or after bedtime, get real here people), to do a workout or bible study, understand that this job is tiring. Sometimes more tiring than when I worked the night shift (and I am not a night person). I won't bore you with the details, but just know that having three children ages three-and-a-half and younger does not make for long restful nights of sleep. So being asked to get up at 5:00 to be up before everyone else and have time to workout, read, shower or do anything is asking a lot of an already sleep-deprived person.

Don't misunderstand me, I'm not throwing a pity party for myself, I'm not asking for one of my overly-generous friends to take me for a pedicure, I'm just wondering how do I fight burn out and to stay in the right frame of mind for my children? I'll tell you what I've done so far. Pray. First, I give thanks for my healthy children. Children who are healthy enough to make messes and be healthy enough to fight over the same toy. I give thanks that I could afford to throw Owen a birthday pizza party with framily (family + friends who are family). I give thanks that there were leftover cokes so mommy can enjoy some caffeine later today :). I pray thanks that Cole is asking for his third helping of applesauce after his breakfast before I've had even a sip of water (or coffee) or a bite of my own breakfast. I pray thanks that we were able to budget for the boys to be in school two days a week for the summer so that I could get caught up on things around the house and schedule a yearly physical, eye exam, dental appointment, etc. Then I pray for a better attitude. I pray for my anger to quiet (as I scrub sticky soda off my baseboards). I pray for motivation to get back on track for the day. I pray for a refreshed spirit. I pray to be excited to spend these moments with my children. I pray to recognize the big picture, that in just a year, Cole will be in pre-K and I won't have him at home full-time anymore; that I recognize these moments are just that, moments and then the next stage of life begins. I pray to remember why I chose to be a full-time stay-at-home-mom...so that I don't miss these moments. I missed Cole's first crawl because I was working and in school...nothing was worth missing that. Nothing. I chose to be a FT SAHM because my children are only this little once. And I can't get that time back. I love my "job" even though I don't like to call it that because in the grand scheme of life, it is WAY more enjoyable than just a "job." I. just. pray. I'm taking a lesson from what my children are being taught at church "I give thanks." And one of my favorite verses is from Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God..." It will all be ok!

Dear Daughter

Genesis 3:16 "To the woman he said, "I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.""

Jeremiah 1:5 "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."

Dear Daughter,

I write this as you and Owen are snuggled next to each other in my bed, I love that he loves you so much. Cole would be right here with us too (well, on his own side of the bed with remote in hand watching cartoons) if he weren't still asleep in his own bed :) I write this on your 3-month birthday. I write this because the last 3 months have been many things from exciting to exhausting. From fulfilling to challenging. I write this because I love this story. I write this because I do not want to forget!

When we found out we were pregnant with you we were a bit surprised. After having dealt with Owen's colic for 7 months, I didn't feel I could handle another baby. But God knew otherwise and as always, had his own plan. In fact, just two weeks before making our family of 4 permanent (catch my drift, ha!?), we found out we were expecting you! What were we thinking trying to overpower God's plan? I am forever thankful His plan won out over ours!

Each of my pregnancies were a little different, but this time around the morning sickness was B-R-U-T-A-L...even landing me in the ER. And just to keep things interesting, I decided that I did not want to find out what we were having until you were born. It took some convincing for daddy to be on board with not finding out (he is a BIG planner, you know!). As I wrote in an earlier post, there was something romantic about NOT knowing the sex of our baby - something special about waiting 10 months and having that ONE moment in life where the doctor yells out "IT's A..."! He was on board! And maybe the wildest of my ideas was that I wanted to give unmedicated childbirth a fair shot. I'd had epidurals with the boys...Cole's delivery was uneventful but Owen's was a bit scary when my blood pressure dropped...Daddy was 100% on board with whatever I chose during labor & delivery...just the support I needed...but, eeek!

My labor & your delivery were so amazing. I do not want to ever forget. At my 38+ week appointment, measurements were way off (not unusual, we'd been through the same with the boys) and the ultrasound was not 100% reassuring, so our doctor sent me to be checked into L&D that night. And while I was induced (not really the decision I wanted but what was best), the remainder of L&D was unmedicated. I mean absolutely zero zip zilch pain medications. I had several ladies in my life who encouraged me & had suggested the Bradley Method, so we gave it a shot. Going from 1cm-7cm was "easy," relatively speaking. Don't get me wrong, it was a WORKOUT...staying focused - remember to belly breathe through contractions, focus on relaxing, allow daddy (aka coach) to talk me through contractions. As I got to 7cm, I knew it. I knew it because I whispered my safety word to coach...this was the word I chose to use if I got to the point I couldn't take the pain & wanted the epidural. Uncle. He ignored me, he knew I was SO close & I would regret opting out at this point. Oh words-I-can't-say-in-front-of-my-children! Going from 7-10cm hurt like I never imagined. There is about a 30-minute period that I don't remember and it's probably for the best. Coach referred to it as an 'exorcism!' Ha! I do know however that there were some bad words & that I was SO sore in my arms & back the next day (along with a bruised nose bridge...what was I doing?? Ha!). I remember as I reached the "I have to push & there's no stopping me, where is the doctor" point, a nursing assistant got in my face & snapped me into shape like a drill sargeant. I was so thankful for her! But boy, when the doctor walked in, I refused the stirrups (at some point) & pushed for only 90 seconds! And yes, it does feel like your body is on fire and that it is ripping open, but (thankfully) in reality it is neither of those & temporary. I have not heard anyone mention this before (maybe because it's too graphic for some) but feeling you being born, Feeling you enter this world was worth Every labor pain. Every. Then the OB said, "ok dad, what is it?" I didn't even give daddy a chance, I sat up, looked & yelled out "GIRL!!!" I think daddy was too much in shock to say anything :) After he cut the cord & you were placed on my chest, I just sobbed. Sobbing of complete joy! I AM so blessed to have two mama's boys, of knowing how special my bond is with my boys, that my heart swelled knowing daddy would now get the oopportunity to be wrapped around his child's finger :) And I know that someday my boys will marry and while I can never be replaced as their mother, they will have another woman in their lives. But having a daughter, I know I will always be The woman in your life.

I love each of you more than you will ever understand until you have children of your own. I love each of you will all my heart & soul, with every fiber of my being, for always & forever, amen!

All in a Day's Work

Ever wonder what it's like to be a Stay at Home Mom?! Well, here's a rundown of what my Wednesday was like...

Up at 4:00am...potty break...7 months prego & can't go back to sleep...finally get out of bed around 5:30am...work on our budget since it's payday

Cole up at 6:00am & Owen up at 7:00am...breakfast and cleanup (it's craziness, but I'll spare you)

Our goal for the morning is to purge toys that the boys hardly ever or never play with anymore. Christmas is in two weeks and it'll be like Toys R Us up in here.

All hell breaks loose.

Timeouts. Spankings. Disciplining for hitting baby brother. Endless.

As I put up toys that we are going to keep, the boys are right behind me taking them back out...argh!

Time to get ready for gymnastics. I take a half shower (no time to wash my hair...oh well, the other mommies understand). During my whole 5-minute shower, the boys have managed to throw my shoes EVERYwhere...on the floor, shelves and in the laundry basket. Then Cole says "mommy's undies stuck on the shelf!" What?! Yup, he found a pair of my undies and somehow got them stuck up on the top shelf...it's about 7-feet high (or something like that, I'm short so I dunno know). They're still stuck up there today.

Get Owen dressed...onto brushing our teeth. Owen climbs up the step stool before I get in there and he's using Cole's toothbrush. Moving on. As I'm fixing Cole's hair, I look over to see Owen reaching his toothbrush into the toilet...I squeal. He stops. Must stay one step ahead of this little guy!

I FINALLY get Cole dressed (he's entered this phase of not wanting to get dressed...boys). We're out the door. Oh, I made sure to take him potty before we left. I KNOW he has to poop, but I don't DARE put him in a pull-up...he's been potty-trained way too long! In the middle of gymnastics, his teacher comes running towards me carrying Cole. Oh crap. Literally. She says they were jumping on the trampoline and worked it right out of him. Crap. I practically throw Owen at his instructor and run Cole off to the bathroom. Get him cleaned up (hooray for an extra set of clothes and undies in the car). Back to class. Thankfully the instructors are understanding and say they have dealt with MUCH worse. I don't even want to know.

As we leave the gym, Owen decides to have a meltdown. Oh joy. Hard enough to handle those when I'm not prego, but after having Braxton Hicks all morning, carrying a screaming squirming 18-month old is going to make me drop one of these babies, if you know what I mean.

We make it home. Yay!

As I'm making lunch, I hear a crash and a muffled "mom, hurry over here" cry. Owen has fallen head-first into a small toy box we keep in the living room. It was full prior to the toy purge, but afterwards, it was hard for him to reach the toys at the bottom. Cole promptly tells me "Owen real stuck!" I look over to see this...



I'll spare you the details of all the boring tasks I completed during naptime, but let's just say it's a whirlwind once the boys fall asleep...my to-do list seems to grow rather than shorten so I have to work like a madwoman.

With all the craziness aside, my boys certainly have their moments of sweetness and compassion. For instance, when Cole gets up in the morning (the boys now share a bedroom in preparation for baby #3), he quietly closes the door leaving it slightly cracked so that Owen can continue to sleep :) So sweet! And in the middle of the toy purge, I decided to lower a bookshelf full of text books (I've done it a million times trying to get it just right), but this time the shelf tipped and all the books fell on my head and around me. Before the books were done hitting the floor, Owen was by my side (as close as he could get without being smashed himself), whimpering hysterically. He then starts frantically grabbing at books trying to get close to me. Poor guy needed more consoling than I did! But it sure put a smile on my face to see how concerned he was. Sweet boys! I love them and all their craziness!

And even though I am one pooped puppy at the end of the day, I sure get joy out of making my husband laugh as I share the craziness that happens in our house in a day :)

Giving

Deuteronomy 15:10 - Give generously to him and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the LORD your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to.

Every Christmas we try to give some sort of gift to those in need. This year, I decided we would give in a few different ways. One gesture we are keeping secret (except for the recipient), the second gift we donated this past week (discussed below), and the third we plan to go in with other members of our family & adopt a child or family from the Angel Tree. The reason I share this is in hopes that it encourages you to give if you don't already, I absolutely believe that you will be blessed many times over for even the smallest gesture! And for anyone who is still skeptical about couponing, maybe this will help sway you towards the coupon side (and save you some big bucks!).

So, I decided I wanted to take a set amount of money, work my coupon magic and donate items to a local charity. Here's how it went. I took $105 to CVS and purchased $185 worth of items...that is a 43% savings! I called a local charity to find out their needs at this time and tailored my shopping to what they needed most in their stockpile.



Transaction 1:
(4) Pantene $6.97/for 2 (on sale) - $3/off 2 & $1/off 2 = $9.94
(9) Jumbo packs of Pampers @ $9.50 (on sale) - (4) $2/off 2 bags = $77.50
(1) Jumbo packs of Pampers @ $9.50 (on sale) - (1) $1/off 1 bags = $8.50
(1) Tide $5.94 (on sale) - $0.50/off 1 = $5.44
(3) Puffs $0.99 ea (on sale) - $0.25/off 3 = $2.72
(3) Dawn dish soap $0.99 ea (on sale) - $0.50/off 1 & $0.50/off 1 & $0.25/off 1 = $1.72
SUBTotal before tax = $105.82
*Special Promo this week, for every $30 you spend on specified products, you get a $10 gift card, I received $40 in gift cards because my balance BEFORE coupons was $120.82.
*I got (1) $10 gas card to donate and $30 in CVS gift card, so onto...

Transaction 2:
(2) Always $6/for 2 (on sale) - $1.00/off 1 & $0.50/off 1 = $4.50
(1) Glide floss $4.29 (on sale) - $0.50/off 1 = $3.79
(1) Crest 6oz toothpaste $4.69 (on sale) - $0.75/off 1 = $3.94
(1) Crest double pack 8oz toothpaste $8.29 (on sale) - $0.75/off 1 = $7.54
(2) Crest mouthwash 500mL $4.89ea (on sale) - (2) $1.00/off 1 = $7.78
SUBTotal before tax = $27.55 (I then used the $30 CVS GC and owed $0.30 out of pocket to cover tax!)
*Special Promo this week, for every $10 spent on Crest ProHealth, get $5 ECB, I earned one $5ECB (I goofed and came up $1.24 short to get my second $5ECB...but had the boys with me so I didn't have time to go back). So onto...

Transaction 3:
(2) Old Spice deodorants $5/for 2 (on sale) - $1/off 2 = $4
(1) M&M (impulse buy to keep boys from running out of patience, plus needed to get to $5 to use all my ECB) = $1.19
SUBTotal before tax = $5.19 - $5 ECB = $0.71 out of pocket to cover tax!

BOTTOM LINE...had I just walked in and bought all these items on a random day, I could have paid up to $184.35 before tax
If I got lucky on my random day and the items were all on sale, I would have paid $141.82 before tax
However, I did about 30 minutes of planning with coupons and promos before going to CVS & only paid $105.82!!! That equals a 43% savings from retail and 26% from sale price!!

Anywho, my point was to give more than just cash, but to use something I've been practicing and am enthusiastic about to give even more than I imagined! Good luck to you & I hope you find some way to give this Christmas season!

Being Green(er)

So, last Friday (I tend to post on Fridays, anyone else notice that?!? Maybe I'll write about that one day!) I posted about recycling. But, there are many other ways to be green around your home (and thus teaching your children about being green). It's about making it a habit. If something is a habit, you're more likely to do it regularly, right?! Well, here are some simple outside-the-usual-recycling-box things that we do around our home to do our part in being green:

1. Use reusable shopping bags. Now, although I preach this, I am terrible at remembering them at the store, especially the grocery store! Once in awhile I will remember them if I'm going clothes shopping or something, but for some reason it slips my mind at Target & Wal-Mart. Anyhoo, I decided to place them in the front seat of my car in hopes that I will remember :) Plus, Target gives you $0.05 off for each bag you use and Whole Food gives you $0.10!

Say "green"


2. Reuse your dryer sheets!!! Who woulda thunkit?! Those little suckers are packed with a lot to give. With Bounce sheets, I will dry two loads of laundry, saving the sheets from each load and then use those two for the third load instead of grabbing a fresh sheet. If I'm using a cheaper brand (will remain nameless, ha!), I will use three sheets to get the softness I'm looking for (I'm very picky!). I can typically reuse a dryer sheet about two - three times before I've decided it's been beat up enough.

3. Unplug appliances. We have some lamps we use daily & those stay plugged in at all times (along with the televisions). However, all of my small kitchen appliances (even the ones I leave out on the countertop) stay unplugged unless I'm using them. Same goes for the boys' humidifiers, iPhone chargers & computers.

4. Purchase & use cloth napkins. For some reason it really bugs me to use paper napkins! I'm quirky like that. I will even save the extra paper napkins from restaurants. Anyways, I purchased some cloth napkins & they have worked out great! I just throw them in with my usual towel laundry loads and it doesn't create any extra loads (better for the environment and your wallet)! They quickly paid for themselves. Plus, they just look nicer on the table :)

Speaking of laundry, Baby O likes to get into things...


There are other things we/I do that have become so much of a habit that I can't think to name them here. When I do, I'll share for anyone interested in doing their part :) If you have any ideas/suggestions for being green(er) around the home, please share, I'm always looking to improve!

Being Green

And no, I'm not talking about being Green with envy or the color of Kermit the Frog or wishing you had more of it in your wallet :) I'm talking about being Earth-friendly!

After spending nearly a decade in Austin, TX, we picked up some Green habits, one of them being recycling. And while Tulsa offers curbside recycling, I opted-out because they only accept a few of the many recyclable items in their bin. Thankfully, Tulsa also offers a great resource for recycling household goods...The Met

So, I created our own little "recycling center" in our garage...


Doing their part!


Excited about recycling!


Here's how we have it set up...

1. We separate out all the recyclables (as preferred by the recycling center). Items that the BA location accepts include:
   
   #1 Plastic
   #2 Plastic
   Glass
   Paper Goods (magazines, newspaper, office paper)
   Paperboard (boxes that Kleenex, cereal, toothpaste, etc. come in)
   Aluminum Cans
   Batteries (household batteries - not just car batteries!)
   Plastic Lids
   Plastic shopping bags - reuse asl trash bags or take to Wal-Mart for recycling
   Paper shopping bags - I reuse almost all of what I have
   
   When we use up a Plastic, Glass or Aluminum item, we rinse it out (if needed), remove any outer stickers or paper/plastic wrap & place it in the corresponding bin. With Paperboard, we remove any inner plastic bags or attached plastic (like with cereal & Kleenex boxes).



2. Once a month we take Paper Goods to our church and dump it in their Green paper bin (looks like a dumpster). Many schools and churches have these in their parking lots and they get money for recycling paper goods. So not only are you helping the environment, you are helping your local school/church! A tip: usually these items do not need to be separated, you can simply dump all your paper items into the bin.




3. Once a month the boys and I take the remaining recyclables to The Met in Broken Arrow. There are usually people there to help unload the items and place them where they need to go (this is nice when the kids are in the car with me). This particular location works with the Gatesway Foundation...again, not only are you helping the environment, but you are helping a local charitable organization and others in need!



4. Note: The Met doesn't take Plastic Lids, but Aveda in the mall accepts them.

Recycling is a small thing we can do to make a big difference - it provides products that can be broken down and reused as well as minimizing our landfills and leaving the Earth a better place for our future! Check out The Met for the closest recycling location to you!